The big trip and the return home! (Part 2)

On with the trip! Here's what we woke up to on day 2:



After a first day of screaming and crying (mostly all from just one of our children...the older one!), the day started quietly, as you can see. The kids quickly got their energy back, though :)







That day, the other family from our adoption agency that was staying at our guest house was scheduled to pick up their new boy. We were going to tag along and take care of some paperwork at the agency's office, so we all jumped in the same van that we were in the day before and headed over to the agency office.

That day was a complete roller coaster. We were so excited to see even a little progress with Tarik already. However, he was still pushing Amy away. The experience at the office made things even harder. Let me say that we are completely happy with our agency and really have no complaints. I think what happened this day was more of an individual thing. Well, basically, the social worker that Tarik clinged to on our Gotcha Day was there. That was fine. The problem was that she was intervening and trying to meet all of Tarik's needs that day instead of allowing the bond between parents and son happen. As you can guess, it quickly felt like all of the progress from the day before was lost. By the end of our time there, he was pushing me away and only wanting her again. I understood that she cared for Tarik, too, but it was time for her to step back and let this new relationship develop. I know I'm not crazy because of one the other employees actually apologized and said they would talk to the social worker (and we hadn't said anything to them about it). There is absolutely no other emotion that is like that one...it's a feeling of helplessness, of brokenheartedness...I just wanted to be there for him so bad and I couldn't. The situation ended up okay, however. I'm not sure if anyone talked to her or not, but it was absolutely clear that when we saw her two days later (I'll post more about that excursion later), she was completely conscious of her actions and basically just stayed away from Tarik to let us bond with him. It was very thoughtful and appreciated.

The paperwork was pretty fast. Basically, we talked to an employee about the kids for bit, then we talked to the nurse and counselor about Tarik and Sophie. They basically said Sophie is no problem and Tarik has a hard time adjusting. Oh, and he hates fried egg :) After that, we signed some documents and, to our surprise, we were given pictures of the children's birth parents. Those will be nice to have down the road when we talk to our kids about adoption.

After the paperwork was done, we spent the rest of the time at the office playing with the kids and partaking in a traditional Ethiopian coffee ceremony. That was so cool!! It is crazy how long it is...not a bad thing, just different than American style. It took about 45 minutes for the first "round" of coffees and they were the size of espressos! They served the coffee with popcorn, but it was really more like kettle corn. Delicious! Here are some pics from the day after Gotcha Day:







More to come soon!!

Phil

The big trip and the return home! (Part 1)

Hey everyone!

I'm so sorry for the delay on the updates. As you can imagine, going from no kids to 2 overnight causes just a bit of change in the ol' daily habits :) We are doing well and the kids are happy and healthy (most of the time...), although Amy has really been nailed by 4 weeks in a row of bad colds. Add in the lack of sleep for new parents and it makes it tough. She's amazing though, and is the awesome mother I knew she'd be.

So, where to start...well, the trip was only 5 days long, but was chock full of tears, smiles, love, and adventure! We waited until the last minute to pack and head to DC, so we literally got 1.5 hours of sleep after the 11 hour drive. We got in at 3:30 and got up at 5 to head to the airport. When I say "we waited", it was because we were fixing up the house for Amy's mom so she could move in and that took every spare second we had.

Here's a clip during our short stopover in Rome. Clearly, I'm tired as can be...



The first day was basically catching up on our rest. Other than that, we took a short trip to some shops to get some Christmas presents for our families and got to know the other families at our guest house. The guest house (Ethiopia Guest House) was awesome. It's a Christian accommodation designed for missionaries and adoptive families. It's very comfortable and has a bed and breakfast feel more than a hotel feel, which is perfect for an adoption trip. Here are some photos of views from the guest house (you'll have to wait until later in this series of blogs for photos of the guest house itself...all of those pics have our kids in them! :) )









There were two other families staying there that were adopting as well; one family from Seattle was adopting a 2 year-old boy and a family from Sydney, Australia was adopting a 5 year-old girl. Both of them were back to adopt for the second time from Ethiopia. It was great to share stories and just have each other for support in general. Here are some pics of the other families:





The second day was the day to pick up the kids! We went to bed that night just thinking about how our lives were going to change so dramatically. I know all first-time parents go through that to some degree...but it was a strange feeling. The next morning, we were nervous, but ready. We really didn't know what to expect. We were thinking that it could be either extreme with Tarik - he might recognize us and be excited or he would freak out.



Well...he freaked out! The little guy did not want to let go of his nanny. The funny thing was that he was clinging to the photo book with our pictures the whole time. He cried and screamed and was just an upset little boy. We spent a while at the boy's orphanage waiting for him to calm down.











The only thing that got him to calm down was when his nanny suggested we go over to the girl's orphanage to see Fasika (Sophie), which was extremely sweet to hear. They had been introduced a week or two before we arrived and he had started to feel drawn to her before "Gotcha Day". Apparently, he hugged and kissed her the day before!

So, we headed over to the girl's orphanage with buddy boy still crying and upset. Sophie was just a bit of a different story...she was just pure sweetness from the beginning. We held her, kissed her, and fed her for a while before she passed out in Amy's arms. Tarik was still sad, but seemed to be getting a little more comfortable with us.















We spent a while there with the kiddos before we finally headed back to the guest house. I'm sure you can imagine how things went then...

The drive back was fine, but Tarik really had a hard time when the social worker got back in the van. Pretty much for the rest of the day, Tarik would point to the front gate about every 10 minutes hoping that the van would pull up and take him back. Little sweetie...We ate lunch and then went back to our room. Tarik threw a huge tantrum that lasted about an hour before he passed out on the floor. It was really cute...he was clinging to the only things he owned in the world: his photo album, his blanket, and his shoes. I think Sophie was still up...she was just hangin' out with Mommy and Daddy.









Even on that first day with our babies, we could really feel a bond starting. I'll admit, it was kinda hard to go from living for myself (and Amy) to having a (very loud) screaming child the next! Tarik probably cried for 5 hours that first day, but we did have some beautiful, sweet moments where Tarik just seemed to relax and understand that we were there to help and care for him.

More coming soon... Like always, thank you for all the prayer and support you have given our family!