Sunday, January 24, 2010

The big trip and the return home! (Part 2)

On with the trip! Here's what we woke up to on day 2:



After a first day of screaming and crying (mostly all from just one of our children...the older one!), the day started quietly, as you can see. The kids quickly got their energy back, though :)







That day, the other family from our adoption agency that was staying at our guest house was scheduled to pick up their new boy. We were going to tag along and take care of some paperwork at the agency's office, so we all jumped in the same van that we were in the day before and headed over to the agency office.

That day was a complete roller coaster. We were so excited to see even a little progress with Tarik already. However, he was still pushing Amy away. The experience at the office made things even harder. Let me say that we are completely happy with our agency and really have no complaints. I think what happened this day was more of an individual thing. Well, basically, the social worker that Tarik clinged to on our Gotcha Day was there. That was fine. The problem was that she was intervening and trying to meet all of Tarik's needs that day instead of allowing the bond between parents and son happen. As you can guess, it quickly felt like all of the progress from the day before was lost. By the end of our time there, he was pushing me away and only wanting her again. I understood that she cared for Tarik, too, but it was time for her to step back and let this new relationship develop. I know I'm not crazy because of one the other employees actually apologized and said they would talk to the social worker (and we hadn't said anything to them about it). There is absolutely no other emotion that is like that one...it's a feeling of helplessness, of brokenheartedness...I just wanted to be there for him so bad and I couldn't. The situation ended up okay, however. I'm not sure if anyone talked to her or not, but it was absolutely clear that when we saw her two days later (I'll post more about that excursion later), she was completely conscious of her actions and basically just stayed away from Tarik to let us bond with him. It was very thoughtful and appreciated.

The paperwork was pretty fast. Basically, we talked to an employee about the kids for bit, then we talked to the nurse and counselor about Tarik and Sophie. They basically said Sophie is no problem and Tarik has a hard time adjusting. Oh, and he hates fried egg :) After that, we signed some documents and, to our surprise, we were given pictures of the children's birth parents. Those will be nice to have down the road when we talk to our kids about adoption.

After the paperwork was done, we spent the rest of the time at the office playing with the kids and partaking in a traditional Ethiopian coffee ceremony. That was so cool!! It is crazy how long it is...not a bad thing, just different than American style. It took about 45 minutes for the first "round" of coffees and they were the size of espressos! They served the coffee with popcorn, but it was really more like kettle corn. Delicious! Here are some pics from the day after Gotcha Day:







More to come soon!!

Phil

2 comments:

Mark and Wendy said...

I'm really enjoying the narration of your big trip! And the kids are just gorgeous!

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